Life is busy, there never seems to be enough hours in the day, and the to-do lists continually seem to grow.
When we lose sight of the important things in life and begin to place too much emphasis on the trivial things, it disrupts the balance and we find ourselves ending our days feeling drained and depleted.
We also find ourselves to be irritable and cranky towards our spouse or families. We start to just go through the motions and the days begin to blend.
Additionally, in life can also leave one feeling depressed or anxious. If this sounds like you, you’re not alone! Feeling overwhelmed with life’s responsibilities is a very typical feeling amongst individuals and couples in our society.
Fortunately, it is never too late to make changes to better yourself and your quality of life.
Love is part of our emotions in the brain and spirit.
Relationships, however, are an entirely different thing. Relationships are working partnerships. They involve thoughts, reasons, and decisions.
They require two or more individuals in communication, commitment, and cooperative exchange.
As a result, love feelings and relationships decisions can have separate rules and expectations.
Love, because it is a feeling, can be unconditional. Sometimes, no matter what a partner does, feelings toward them do not change.
Relationships, however, are working partnerships. As such, they require conditions, boundaries, limits, and directions to run smoothly.
Therefore, a distinction must be made between “unconditional love”…and “unconditional relationships”.
Disclaimer: The information on this POST is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional advice. The opinions expressed within this article are the personal opinions of the author. All content, including text, graphics, images and information, contained on or available through this article is for general information purposes / educational purposes only, and to ensure discussion or debate.
Thank you ….But, Isn’t Love Enough?
Now that we have made the distinction between “unconditional love” and “unconditional relationships”, it is possible to love someone without limit, yet still have contingencies placed upon continuing a relationship with them.
In other words, while you may continue to love a partner “no matter what”, you may not choose to be in a relationship with them under all conditions. This distinction is important to understand. But, it doesn’t hold for everyone…
There are some individuals that say, “No, love is enough”. These individuals decide, as long as they have love, nothing else is necessary.
As a result, their relationships become “unconditional” as well. They do not set firm boundaries, contingencies, or limits with their “partner”.
They make “relationship” decisions based on their feelings of love alone.
Sometimes this works out… Other times, however, because no one is actively creating a working “partnership”, disaster can strike.
Because there is an expectation to “accept the partner for who he/she is” at all times, relationships may perpetuate under the worst of conditions.
Do you want to add a word or two?….
Couples should reflect on their busy schedules and see where there is room to “let things go”.
Maybe you do not get all of the dishes done one night and watch a movie together instead.
Maybe you say “no” to the social gathering over the weekend and relax at home.
Maybe you secure the babysitter for a night out instead of reading the same bedtime story over and over again.
Maybe you order take-out one night instead of cooking for the 5th night in a row to give yourself a break.
The most important thing about prioritizing is knowing what is most important to you and your spouse. Every couple is different and every couple’s priorities are going to be different as well.
Your Comments….
Come up with a list of things together which you know you are unwilling to waiver on and let the rest be flexible. When you begin to prioritize the things which are most important vs. prioritize everything you feel you need to do, life will start to seem much less stressful.
In a world where everything is readily available at our fingertips, it is difficult not to compare your lives to others. Social media, while wonderful in so many ways, can also pose as a potential stressor to the relationship and upset the balance.
You may find that you start to question your relationship status, your family dynamics, and even your happiness.
This may even begin to cause tension in the relationship as one partner may begin to put pressure on the other and you may start trying to achieve and acquire things you believe you should have vs. what is actually applicable for your lives.
Once you stop comparing your life to others and stop basing your happiness on what you think happiness looks like through social media, you will start to feel as though a weight has been lifted.
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