In order for two people to have a deeply satisfying relationship, both have to be able to open themselves up to the other.

But if you don’t trust the other person (or vice-versa), making yourself vulnerable to him or her feels a bit like exposing your neck to a hungry wolf. It doesn’t make sense, and it’ll most likely lead to pain and regret.

Even little things in the heat of a moment can sabotage the trust you worked for months to build:

Losing your temper and harshly criticizing the other

Threatening to leave or to betray the other

Trying to manipulate the other using an ultimatum

Betraying the other’s confidence

Failing to have the others back when your support is most needed

If you want to build a relationship that nurtures you both at the deepest level, mutual trust is essential. Without it, your relationship will remain in “safe mode” — like a computer restarting after an unexpected shut-down.

And while you want the other person to feel safe, you know that the kind of relationship you want involves risk. We’re not meant to be satisfied with superficial relationships.

But to go beyond that, both parties have to work at cultivating trust – both in themselves and in the other person.

Disclaimer: The information on this POST is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional advice. The opinions expressed within this article are the personal opinions of the author. All content, including text, graphics, images and information, contained on or available through this article is for general information purposes / educational purposes only, and to ensure discussion or debate.

Thank you ….Trust in relationships is key to its growth. Consider what it might be like to live a life without trust: you want to share a secret with your spouse but feel unsure; your spouse checks their messages from a friend, and you think they are lying, and so on.

Relationships are difficult to maintain. Every minute of your life becomes a nightmare if you don’t trust each other.

If we don’t feel that we were loved in early childhood, then trust is a tough muscle to build. Because when life gets tough, we automatically default to our entrenched belief systems. That includes our belief systems around trust.

What is required to break free from those default responses is learning, in this case, to trust ourselves?

But how to do that?

Trust needs to be built — and sometimes rebuilt — over time.

I’ve met a guy who I really but how do I know if I can trust him?

I don’t have a great track record with me, and I’m worried that I like him for all the wrong reasons. How do I figure it out?

I have to choose between two job possibilities everybody at both places seems really nice, and the jobs are both good ones. I know I shouldn’t complain. This is a good problem to have. But I can’t figure out which way to go.

I should trust my gut and choose the one that I like best, and that’s fine; I can do that. But it’s not my gut that I’m worried about, but whether or not I can trust that these places are really as incredible as they seem.

Maybe one – or maybe both – of them is just putting on a good front, and they’re not really all that great once you get to know them.

Do you want to add a word or two?….

You cannot love without trusting a person. As mentioned earlier, trust is the building block of love. Just like how a child trusts her mother and thereby loves her, your partner needs to know that you are trustworthy and won’t ditch them in difficult times. This feeling is important for love to sprout and flourish.

Be true to your word and follow through with your actions

The point of building trust is for others to believe what you say. Keep in mind, however, that building trust requires not only keeping the promises you make but also not making promises you’re unable to keep.

Keeping your word shows others what you expect from them, and in turn, they’ll be more likely to treat you with respect, developing further trust in the process.

Learn how to communicate effectively with others

Your Comments……

Poor communication is a major reason why relationships break down. Good communication includes being clear about what you have or have not committed to and what has been agreed upon.

Building trust is not without risk. It involves allowing both you and others taking risks to prove trustworthiness. To navigate this, effective communication is key. Without it, you may find the messages you’ve intended to send aren’t the messages that are received.

Remind yourself that it takes time to build and earn trust

Building trust is a daily commitment. Don’t make the mistake of expecting too much too soon. In order to build trust, first take small steps and take on small commitments and then, as trust grows, you will be more at ease with making and accepting bigger commitments. Put trust in, and you will generally get trust in return.

Take time to make decisions and think before acting too quickly

Only make commitments that you are happy to agree to. Have the courage to say “no,” even when it disappoints someone. If you agree to something and can’t follow through, everyone involved is worse off.

Be clear about what you have on your plate, and keep track of your commitments. Being organized is a necessary part of building trust with family, friends, and colleagues. It enables you to make a clear decision as to whether to agree to requests of your time and energy.

Value the relationships that you have—and don’t take them for granted

Trust often results from consistency. We tend to have the most trust in people who are there for us consistently through good times and bad. Regularly showing someone that you’re there for them is an effective way to build trust.

Develop your team skills and participate openly

When you take an active role in a team and make contributions, people are more likely to respect and trust you. It’s also imperative when building trust in a team to show your willingness to trust others.

Being open and willing to make contributions and to engage demonstrates this. In other words, take what others say into consideration, show that you are listening actively, suggest your thoughts and feedback in a respectful way, and demonstrate that you are willing to be part of the team.

Always be honest

The message you convey should always, always be the truth. If you are caught telling a lie, no matter how small, your trustworthiness will be diminished.

Help people whenever you can

Helping another person, even if it provides no benefit to you, builds trust. Authentic kindness helps to build trust.

Don’t hide your feelings

Being open about your emotions is often an effective way to build trust. Furthermore, if people know that you care, they are more likely to trust you.

Emotional intelligence plays a role in building trust. Acknowledging your feelings, learning the lessons that prevail, and taking productive action means that you won’t deny reality—this is the key to building trust.

Don’t always self-promote

Acknowledgment and appreciation play an important role in building trust and maintaining good relationships. Recognizing and appreciating the efforts of others shows your talent for leadership and teamwork and increases the trust others have in you.+

On the other hand, if people don’t demonstrate appreciation for a good deed, they appear selfish. Selfishness destroys trust.

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