Are you desperately looking for someone who can be your perfect match?
Are you ready for a relationship that will last forever?
Maybe you’re thinking about marriage, but every person you meet just isn’t the right fit. You don’t want to commit to just anyone; you want your soulmate.
As long as you’re with your soulmate, the relationship will be as close to perfect as possible, you think to yourself.
Why is it so hard to find this person, though?
Why do you struggle to find that deep, soulful connection that will finally make you feel fulfilled in your love life?
Don’t you deserve this?
Why is the world, or the universe, or God, or whoever denying you such an important part of your life?
The answer may surprise you: You have been living a lie. Your frustration and suffering comes from a falsehood that has been fed to you probably since you were young.
The truth is that no one ever tells us how human relationships actually work, and so you may have been looking for something that doesn’t exist.
Do Soulmates Exist?
No.
At least, not in the sense that most people are led to believe. There is no specific person out there who will complete your life. There is no “other half” to you. This is a gigantic lie that we are fed by society.
This notion, at its core, is not malicious. People didn’t tell you that you had to find “the one”
The problem is that this mental model of romantic love will lead to nothing but frustration. Even if you find “the one,” this sense of destiny and worship towards your romantic partner will slowly unravel the relationship and fill it with neediness. It’s a recipe for disaster.
“Soulmates” in the usual sense can’t exist because you are a complete person on your own.
Finding a romantic partner—even a great one, even the “right” one—will never fulfill you. You can search to the ends of the Earth, but you will never find your other half. If there is a void in your life, it can never be filled by anyone except you.
Disclaimer: The information on this POST is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional advice. The opinions expressed within this article are the personal opinions of the author. All content, including text, graphics, images and information, contained on or available through this article is for general information purposes / educational purposes only, and to ensure discussion or debate.
Thank you … The best way to make your relationships better is to make yourself better. The satisfaction you have with your relationship is directly related to your own sense of happiness and satisfaction with yourself.
By believing in and searching for a soulmate to make your life more fulfilling, you are assuming that the basis for a happy relationship is “out there” in finding the right person. You are living with the delusion that if you just find the right person, everything will be better.
In a lot of ways, though, it doesn’t matter who you are with so much as who you are yourself. If you change who you are, then you will change the kinds of people who gravitate towards you, anyway.
You will naturally find your ideal mate if you work towards transforming into your ideal self and living your authentic life. Without this, you will simply not find the kind of person that you would call a soulmate; they will not be attracted to you.
Do you want to add a word or two?….
If you’re looking for a soulful relationship, a deep connection that many people might call a “soulmate,” that is possible. It is also entirely up to you in a lot of ways.
You may have not found “the one” yet because you have simply not opened yourself up to the right connections. There may be people in your life right now who could make good long-term partners, but you might not even notice them.
More commonly, you might just be failing to attract the type of people you want because there is a mismatch between who you really are and what you’re showing to the outside world. In order to attract a deep relationship, here is what you need to do.
Your comments ….
Do you keep people at arm’s length because you’re afraid of being hurt? Do you have a fake self that you show to people because you’re afraid they would judge the real you? You can’t expect to attract a deep relationship when people can’t see the real you. It’s impossible.
Be more vulnerable.
Be honest and upfront. Put yourself out there, even if it means that some people will reject you. You will have to face rejection from some people if you ever hope to find people who will love you for who you are.
If you have to take a break from consuming media to change your mindset, then so be it. In fact, this may be beneficial for you in more ways that just your romantic life. Forget what people, the media, or your culture tells you is the ideal–figure out what you actually want for yourself, and start attracting it!
Approach lots of people. Realize that you can have many “soulmates.”
You never know who will be a good match for you, so don’t start by narrowing your requirements down too much. Instead of waiting for someone to show up, be active about your intentions. Tell people that you’re looking for someone. Go on dates. Socialize with others and make friends who could potentially turn into something more.
The root of neediness (which turns people off like nothing else) is being attached to certain results. If you desperately need for someone to be your soulmate, to marry you, or to be with your forever and ever, you are poisoning the relationship.
It may seem counter-intuitive, but the deepest, most long-lasting relationships have a bit of healthy distance. A good relationship where people are emotionally close is very different from the obsessive closeness of a co-dependent relationship.
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